Strategies to help you keep that resolution for good
We are now nearly 2 months through the new year, and it is likely that the New Years resolutions that you set are largely forgotten or at least loosing steam. According to a Forbes Health/One Poll survey the average resolution lasts just 3.74 months. According to the same study 37% of Americans said they had a goal or resolution they wanted to achieve in 2023, with 87% saying they were very or somewhat likely to keep it through the year. A large percentage of us want to make changes, most of us are convinced we will succeed at these changes, and yet very few make it past the first few months of focus on the identified goal.
When it comes to the types of resolutions that people set, it is fair to say that wellness is at the center of them all. When you look at this list, every one of these top areas are wellness centered. It is clear that as a society we are very wellness conscious, but that we also tend to struggle when seeking to make lasting changes centered on our health and wellbeing.
What are the reasons that these resolutions rarely make it past the start of Spring? A few of the reasons include:
- Unrealistic Goals: Goals are often too ambitious, or too vague.
- Lack of Tracking: Everyone needs a scoreboard. If you don’t know the score, how can you know how you are doing?
- Lack of Accountability: An accountability partner always helps. Writing down your goals and reading them often is also key. Checking in with yourself often to identify progress is an important step.
- Too Many Resolutions: Spreading your focus too thin is a recipe for failure. It is hard to focus on more than a couple of areas at a time.
- All or Nothing Mentality: Everyone faces setbacks. Moving forward and sticking with your goals even after a stumble makes a difference.
- Negative Self Talk: Being overly critical of ourselves, or lacking confidence in our abilities can quickly lead to failure. If you believe you can’t, you are right.
How do we overcome these and other obstacles that keep us from seeing success on our resolutions and goals? Let’s explore some strategies that can help us to tip the scales to the side of success. These are strategies that can be the difference between seeing real positive movement in our wellness goals.
Setting the Stage for Success
Realistic Goal-Setting
Ambitious goals can be inspiring, but they often lack the specificity and attainability necessary for success. Our goals often are outcome focused, which is a great start, but lack actionable steps that will lead to the result we are after. For example, you can say you want to lose 10 pounds, but by itself this goal lacks focus. How are you going to get there? A more actionable plan might focus on going to the gym 4 times a week, walking 10,000 steps a day, or eating 30 grams of protein at breakfast. Not only do these promote the specific behaviors that will help to reach the overall goal, but they are also easy to track.
Progress Tracking
Speaking of tracking, monitoring your habits provides insight into your patterns and progress. There are great tools out there that can help you with this. We all carry a minicomputer in our pockets (cell phone) that has countless apps and tools that can make tracking behaviors simple. For others the process of putting pen to paper is motivating and impactful. What is important is that you find the method that works well for you. Visualizing your achievements can reinforce your commitment and give you an opportunity for personal accountability. It also provides powerful feedback that can help you identify what is or isn’t working well for you.
Accountability Partners
Sharing your goals with someone creates a support system that can reinforce your resolve. We all have days when our life gets in the way, or our motivation might be lacking. Knowing that we have someone that is in it with you can help you through those tough times. Sometimes knowing that someone is going to be checking in with you is enough to push yourself into action. Other times, your accountability partner might be able to give us the pep talk that we need to get us over a hump and to keep going. Most of all, having someone to celebrate your wins with is powerful and a big part of the reward of successful goal achievement.
Keep it Simple
Concentrating on too many changes simultaneously can dilute your efforts. This will usually lead to mild improvements with mastery being illusive. As a business leader, I loved to use the phrase “Simplify the message and repeat often” in my coaching. Focus on one or two habits at a time, clearly identify what success looks like in those areas, track your progress, identify opportunities for continued improvement, and repeat the process. Work on it until you have it mastered and then move onto the next opportunity.
Embracing Setbacks
Perfection is not the end goal. Unfortunately, too many of us get sidetracked into focusing on process perfection and not the big picture goal. Let’s look at an example: Imagine my goal is losing 10 pounds and my habits that I am focusing on are to go to the gym 4 times a week, walk 10,000 steps and to eat 30 grams of protein at breakfast. Maybe I have been on point with these goals for 2 months, but then life gets busy and I am not hitting those habits very consistently. Many of us will get discouraged that we fell off the wagon and the goal will quickly be left behind as a failure. Earlier we talked about the value of tracking. Why is tracking important? Tracking is essentially a method of feedback. Why does feedback matter? It is an opportunity to see how we are doing and to find areas to improve as well as areas to celebrate. Imagine if instead of getting discouraged at a failure to hit all your goals, you took the time to look at the feedback instead and did a self-assessment of your progress. You could look at what challenges you had that kept you from hitting your targets, find ways to overcome those challenges and then move forward with an upgraded plan on how to improve. Instead of seeing your missteps as a failure, they become a valuable tool in taking another step towards success. Feeback is a gift. Persistence, not perfection, is the key to habit transformation and analyzing and improving on these mistakes will only aid in that progress if we allow it to.
Positive Self-Talk
A big part of reaching our goals is dependent on an honest belief that we can make the changes that we are aiming for. We all start with a belief that the goal we set is attainable, or we would not have set it in the first place. For every goal we fail to reach, some level of doubt creeps in. We tell ourselves that the goal is too hard for us, that we don’t have the skill or ability to accomplish it, or that it is no longer a priority. Just as these negative thoughts will keep us from finding success, positive reinforcement can empower you. Having a mindset of confidence and self-compassion is vital in reaching our goals. It comes very natural for many of us to focus on the negative. Flipping the script and finding the positive to celebrate can make a world of difference in how we view ourselves and in helping to control our inner dialog in a positive way. Keeping a gratitude journal can be a great way to train our minds to look for the good. Simply having an awareness of our thoughts and emotions is also a great way to take inventory of how we are feeling. Notice when you engage in negative self-talk and acknowledge these thoughts without judgment. When you catch yourself thinking negatively, challenge these thoughts. Ask yourself if they’re truly accurate or if there’s a more positive perspective. Meditation and prayer are great tools to help find inner peace. Creating positive affirmations that you review often, and surrounding yourself by positive people also go a long way into helping you keep your mind as an instrument of support and not discouragement.
Understanding Your Triggers and Obstacles
What are the cues that prompt bad habits that you are trying to remove or replace? It could be boredom, stress, location, or time. What obstacles keep you from reaching your goals? Understanding these and recognizing them will prepare you for how to react to these triggers. If you are a stress eater, having an awareness of this is powerful in kicking that habit. Once you have an awareness of this, you can create a plan around how to react when this urge comes along. A great way to accomplish this is to replace the existing behavior with one that is healthier. Instead of grabbing a bag of chips when you are stressed at work, identifying the stress cue and in its place taking a few minutes to practice deep breathing would be a great alternative. It all starts with identifying the trigger so that you can address it in a more wellness focused way.
Make it Fun
Finding ways to make your new habit fun will help you to stick with it. Listening to music or a book while you workout can help time to move faster. Gamification of your habit tracking can make it more fun as well. I created a daily checklist using an app on my phone. As I checked off each task for the day I was rewarded with a celebratory sound and confetti on my phone. It also tracked streaks and awarded me with badges showing my progress. As small as this sounds, it made simple habits fun to track as I earned these small but impactful awards. Treat yourself to rewards as you make progress and hit milestones. As I mentioned earlier, it is much more fun when we share our success with others, so make sure you take time to celebrate with your accountability partners to add more enjoyment in the process.
Make it Easy
There are hacks that make achieving positive results easier. Motivation can be one of the hardest parts of the process. Just getting started is normally the biggest challenge. Do yourself a favor and make starting easier. If you want to work out in the morning, lay your clothes out at night or even wear them to bed. Want to drink more water? Keep a bottle at your desk. Want to read at night instead of looking at your phone? Keep a book on your nightstand. Want to eat healthier? Keep healthy foods at your house and get rid of the junk foods you are trying to avoid. Habits don’t have to be painful. Use every advantage you can to make them as easy to achieve as possible.
Remember Your Why
There is a good reason that you set this goal in the first place. Reflect on this often. If your goal is to lose weight, what is the reason for that? Maybe it is because you want a long healthy life with your kids. Maybe it is because your clothes are all tight and you just don’t feel good in them. Perhaps you just want to walk around with more confidence because you feel better about how you look. Whatever the reason is, reflect on this often. This can be a motivating force that keeps you going when things get hard. Understanding the reason behind what you are working so hard on, makes it much harder to give up on it and can be the push that helps you achieve your wellness goals.
Conclusion
Remember, the success of your resolutions isn’t measured by the absence of obstacles, but by your response to them. Each day presents a new opportunity to reaffirm your commitment to your goals and to the person you aspire to become. It’s not about the speed of your progress, but the direction in which you’re moving.
Incorporate the strategies we’ve explored into your daily routine, and let them guide you towards a healthier, happier life. Set realistic goals, track your progress, find support, and celebrate every victory, no matter how small. And when you face setbacks, greet them with resilience and view them as valuable lessons rather than insurmountable barriers.
In closing, let’s not forget that the ultimate goal is not just to achieve a set of resolutions but to cultivate a lifestyle that reflects our deepest values and aspirations. It’s about becoming the best version of ourselves, one habit at a time.
If you set a resolution that is already falling by the wayside, don’t give up on it. You can recommit to it today. Yes, the start of a new year is a great time for new beginnings and goals, but improving ourselves is not limited to the change on a calendar.